Kathy Buckworth is an award-winning writer, television personality and public speaker, with numerous publishing credits in both national and local magazines and newspapers. Her monthly column, "Funny Mummy" appears on over 25 websites across Canada, the U.S. and New Zealand, as well as in print.
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My Name is Kathy and I'm a BusyBody
2010/02/26
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“Are you busy?” I know I’m not alone in reacting negatively when I hear these words. Particularly if they’re coming from my teenage daughter looking for something scintillating to do with my time like driving her to the mall or the golden opportunity to wash her field hockey socks, or it might even be from my seven year old son standing in front of me indignant that I don’t share his excitement over playing (and deliberately losing) the game of Sorry for the 27th time that day. Meanwhile I’m refereeing the other two kids who are fighting over who has to put away the hockey net…and I know it’ll be me at midnight doing that task as well. Yep, the minute our children are born, we become eternally, frustratingly, tirelessly and mind-numbingly busy.
Non-parents have a hard time understanding how a newborn baby keeps people so busy. Here’s the thing: the busy-ness of a newborn parent should be measured in terms of the ratio of hours slept versus activities to be performed. That is to say it’s true that many of the tasks that are being demanded of you are fairly pedestrian and easily performed…if you’ve had a good night’s sleep. Did I mention these are parents of newborns I’m talking about? Once you reduce that sleep to 6 fitful starts and stops over an 8 hour period, washing sleepers, having a shower, and remembering where you put your keys down become Herculean efforts. (Not to mention that pesky detail of being responsible for sustaining a fragile new life.)
As the baby grows, and you decide it’s a good idea to have some more of them, (darn wine) you quickly realize that the busy you thought you had when you were a) single and/or b) childless seemed like a “good” busy. Now your days are filled with chauffeuring children to endless lessons, hockey arenas, friend’s homes, school functions and the aforementioned mall, while racing home in between to throw in that 7th load of laundry, unload the dishwasher for the 3rd time that morning, make 6 calls to 6 different doctors of teeth, bones, needles and backs, madly scratching out school registration forms, planning your frozen food dinner and trying to find the elusive ½ inch scrap of “blankie” for a wailing toddler…well it’s hard to find the “good” in the “busy”.
As my husband pushed a child towards the front door on the way to a ubiquitous hockey game the other day, he asked me “Why are we always so busy?” And I responded: “If we weren’t driving them around, we’d be watching them fight. It’s not a question of this versus free time. It’s a question of how you are busy. Now pass me the flipping Sorry game before you go.”
And now all I have to do now is convince my four kids that waggling a half empty glass of chardonnay is in fact an appropriate response to the question “Are you busy?”
Kathy Buckworth’s latest book “Shut Up & Eat: Tales of Chicken, Children & Chardonnay” will be released in March 21, 2010.
Also check out www.kathybuckworth.com for more from Kathy.
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